


Frenemies4Lyfe

by Skyland2704



Category: Kaizoku Sentai Gokaiger, Power Rangers, Power Rangers Ninja Storm
Genre: Ancient Warlords, Based on a Tumblr Post, Bounty Hunters, Can can music, Childhood, Childhood Friends, Childhood Memories, Childhood Trauma, Fur, Gen, Glitter, M/M, Offenbach, Prep School, School, Shimazacus, Space Ninjas, Space Pirates, Walk Into A Bar, catfighting, link in the notes, okay more than 'a' tumblr post
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-26
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-17 09:01:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29714811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skyland2704/pseuds/Skyland2704
Summary: What happens when a Feared Assassin/Bounty Hunter meets his arch-nemesis-frenemy-for-life-since-they-were-five-years-old after a LOOONG LOOONG time?! Chaos *Cue Offenbach's Can Can music*
Relationships: Basco Ta Jolokia & Vexacus, Shimazu/Vexacus (Power Rangers)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	Frenemies4Lyfe

**Author's Note:**

  * For [GalwitMystoEggos](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GalwitMystoEggos/gifts).



> Sooo this was based on a series of tumblr posts by [@cupcakes-are-ours](https://cupcakes-are-ours.tumblr.com/) and [@stardowruinedme](https://stardowruinedme.tumblr.com/ask)
> 
> Also I couldn't include all the posts (Cuz there's too many of them, but here's a link to them all, [Right Here!](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/cupcakes-are-ours/search/prep+school)
> 
> Oh and I mention Offenbach's Can Can quite a LOT here, cuz it suits this like HELL, so here's two links to Can Can, just so ya can get the actual **feels** one is the [Original!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Diu2N8TGKA)  
> And the other one is that [Tom and Jerry Remix](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=obysilrbgas) that gave me the idea to put it in here.

A shark-like bounty hunter, slim, and proper, eyes as sharp and cruel, his jagged sword and fan blade tucked away nicely in the folds of his robes, walked into the bar in a local suburb on the planet Xanthia. Walking with him, was the Ancient Warlord Shimazu, one of the strongest beings of their time. Both of them walked hand in hand, slowly relishing the fear, as the weaker less powerful alien customers, recognising the faces of the Warlord and Assassin, knowing their reputation, scurried about, trying to get out of there.

Oh yes, Shimazu and Vexacus had quite a reputation all over the galaxy. Personality vise, everyone knew that Vexacus was an irredeemable, ruthless, sadistic, arrogant, and cold-hearted being that will destroy anyone in his path, while Shimazu was calm, quiet, manipulative, sadistic, and very cunning. And despite his slightly amusing personality and antics, he was a treacherous and merciless trickster.

Their reputation was something that had only been tarnished by the meddling of those pesky Power Rangers, but even that was kept under the covers by Lothor, thankfully. So almost no one knew anything about that little disgrace of theirs outside of Earth.

This was what most knew about the Antagonist Duo. But what almost none did know, was this: They were dating. This was as unknown as was the fact that the power Rangers kept defeating them. Not that they tried to hide this, but they were quite private about their personal lives, and didn’t like anyone meddling.

For now, at least, as they relished the weaklings fleeing from them, the two sat at the bar, and ordered a couple of BloodDark Scotch on the rocks, and settled down to chat, having some time away from Lothor and the minions, who never gave them alone time.

Few minutes later, Shimazu said he needed to visit the loo, and left Vexacus sitting alone, trying to finish the goddamned drink. Shimazu liked it, but to Vexacus, it was literally the most unswallowable thing he had ever tasted, but to act cool, and chill, he slowly tried to get the bloody fizz to die out on his tongue, before drinking, somwthing he avoided doing when Shimazu was around. 

When he was just about to do so for the fourth time, that’s when he felt a very familiar presence in the room. 

_ ‘No it can’t be’ _ Vexacus almost prayed, as the fizz fizzled… it refused to die down on his tongue. It just kept on fizzling, and burning his tongue, as if it knew what Vex was feeling. A fleeting ghost of a thought occurred to him, telling him to run away, but he knew it was too late…

There was a small tap on his shoulder, and cold shark sweat flowed like water, from his forehead, as he knew, before the words came, who they were from.

“Cheerio mate!”

He knew it! The British accent confirmed it even more than anything else.

_ Basco Ta Jolokia _

“Long time no see? Isnit?” his voice was as sardonic, and cheery as ever. Basco being just… Basco.

Vexacus turned around, a brave smile plastered on his face, though he felt like scowling and yelling. 

“Jolly Good!” he replied, realising his accent was far inferior to Basco’s. The next thing he notices, besides the white Fur being about double of what they were back when they were kids, was the ugly as fuck shawl, and slowly withered up seeing it… Ugh someone needs to teach him what aesthetic means. 

Speaking of Aesthetic…

“Tha—” Vexacus coughed once clearing his throat, “That’s a nice… Hip Chain… you got”

“OH yeah, It's mine, of course it’s  _ nice. _ Yours, on the other hand, mate, is… and I comment so with most sincerity, H-I-D-E-O-U-S”

Vexacus’s eyes widened, as the sarcasm dawned upon him, “I was just being nice” Vex stated, “yours are trashy too” 

He huffed, and so did Basco… 

One second passes

Two seconds pass

Three seconds pass

Four seconds pass

Five seconds pass

*Cue Offenbach’s Can Can music* Basco and Vex leap up at each other, in an intense catfight, both just slapping away at each other’s arms, and trying to rip the other’s fins/fur off, and clawing and fighting all the while making angry bird and shark noises.  
The main aim of the fight: RIP THE OTHER’S CHAIN OFF!

It is the bartender who leaps up over the table and towards them and then comes between them, pushing the two apart, separating them, while the two waved their arms in the air like five year olds, trying to reach out to the other, and rip their fur or fins or the chains off. 

“Gentlemen, gentlemen, what sort of a ghastly behaviour is this?” the bartender asked, in a different accent, which also felt quite British.

“HE STOLE MY STYLE!!!!” Both of them yelled in unison, pointing at each other, calming down a little, and not trying to rip each other in half.

The bartender rolled his eyes, “What are you? Five?”

_ Five _

The word rings out, staying in the air around, as both Vexacus and Basco find themselves being dragged into the same flashback, because you know? Twinepathy.

_ Babey Basco reaches over and just starts chomping on Vex's fin during Math class and Vex just babbling all sorts of angry baby shark nonsense and quite nearly crying while basco is just holding on with a smug eating grin on his face, like a puppy when you tell them to drop it, and they don’t. Sure enough, the teacher tells him to drop it, again and again, and Basco only bites harder with his babey fangs and Vex just shrieks and cries even louder. That day, Vex goes home with fang marks on his fins and Basco just keeps cackling away, watching him go.  _

*End of Flashback*

“So… You really grew into your fur, huh” Vexacus started the next string of conversation

Basco smirked, “Naah it’s the same amount I had as a small, tiny, cutest little bean of a babey”

Vex grinned, now would be the perfect time to mention the… “Nice shawl… Ya rob your grandma or something?” Vex asked, pointing at the ugly ass shawl.

“Nice crop top, still can’t fit your clothes huh?” Basco shot back proudly.

*Cue Offenbach’s Can Can music* Basco and Vex leap up at each other, in an intense catfight, both just slapping away at each other’s arms, and trying to rip the other’s fins/fur off, and clawing and fighting all the while making angry bird and shark noises.  
The main aim of the fight: RIP THE OTHER’S CLOTHES.

This time, it’s Shimazu, who is back from the loo, and trying to separate his boyfriend from catfighting with some random stranger.

“How long was I gone?” he asks, when he finally manages to separate them, 

“technically five minutes, though I’d go with a negative twenty years?” the Bartender chimed in, watching with interest, as he stood aside, polishing the glasses.

“What’s up with you two?” Shimazu ignored the cheeky bartender’s effort to make a joke, and questioned said delinquents.

“HE INSULTED MY SHAWL!”

“HE INSULTED MY TOP!”

Shimazu rolled his eyes, “Wha—? I can’t Even!” he took a deep breath, “Who are you?”

“‘Ello mate! Basco Ta Jolokia!” He introduced himself in the cheeriest way possible, grinning ear to ear. 

_ Basco… Spaghetti…  _ That’s the first connection Shimazu’s brain makes with the name, wasn’t this the fiend of nature who terrorized his boyfriend back when he was a kid? Wasn’t this the guy who poured cold spaghetti down Vex’s shirt? The next thought though? _ I’m glad Vex doesn't TALK LIKE  _ **_THAT._ **

“Uhh… Hello? I’m Shimazu, Vex’s boyfriend”   
"Oh crikey! Little shark got a dude, oi?" Basco said, his voice full of excitement, as he smushed Vex's face and then clapped his shoulder as hard as possible. 

"jolly good for ya, old chap!" (Shimazu has absolutely no idea what the fuck he just said)

And Basco slapped Vexacus so hard on the shoulder that he stumbled forward but quickly regained his stoic facade, to try to look all tough in front of Shimazu. Of course it didn't work, everyone in the goddamned bar knew he was putting on a show.

Realising this, Vex grabbed Basco’s tassels and rattled him around but Basco only laughed and pushed Vex away with a hand to the shark face, and Vex stumbled. Then the two looked at each other, fiery eyed, and three more seconds after which, 

*Cue Offenbach’s Can Can music* Basco and Vex leapt up at each other, in an intense catfight, both just slapping away at each other’s arms, and trying to rip the other’s fins/fur off, and clawing and fighting all the while making angry bird and shark noises. The main aim of the fight: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Shimazu had to separate the two yet again, grunting, and rolling his eyes. 

“What are you? Five?”

“NO!” Both protested in unison. 

“Yes, yes they are” the bartender chimed in, with a small ‘ting’ he made with his long nails on a glass. 

Basco and Vex look at each other, both drifting back into the same flashback again, because you know? Twinepathy.

_ Babey Basco was being all emo in art class and scribbling black all over his paper and Vex just toddled over and poured a ton of glitter on it to make it look ‘‘pretty’’ and Basco just fuckin SHRIEKED, getting Mad cause now his fur were all COVERED in glitter and since glitter is freaking impossible to get out, he came to school all sparkly for the next two weeks and Vexacus just cackled evilly, every time he saw Basco’s pout and all that ‘emo’ glitter. _

Shimazu is completely lost, as he sees the two of them almost in a daze, remembering them ol’ days of torment.

_ The next one was of that one time Basco stomped over to the teacher, and cried, like a preppy spoilt child, "TEEEACHERRR VEXY STOLE MY BIIISSSCCUUIIIIITTTSSSS" which got him more cookies, and got Vex in trouble (Yes he was sent to the naughty shark time out chair, which had a ‘I’m thinking about what I’ve done’ sign on top of it… It was horreeball)  _

_ And you know what was the reality? Basco had stolen Vex's cookies and ate them all and wanted more. _

“Get outta that whole Flashback phase will you?”

“Not really, no” Vexacus snickered, as he forced his mind ut of the terrible cookie flashback Basco had started and into one he liked.

_ Vex sneaked hair dye into Basco’s Fluff Shampoo that one time he slept over, and the next morning, Basco came out after taking a bath, not even realising what was wrong, until he looked into the mirror and fucking s-c-r-e-a-m-e-d, as he realised all of his beautiful snowy white floof was all GREEN! Oh yess! Vex called him a Christmas tree for weeks! Not to mention that afterwards he ‘accidentally’ put a ton of fairy lights on Green Floof Basco, saying he confused it with a real tree. _

“Ughh” Basco groaned, “You just HATED my fur don’t you?”   
“I still do,” Vexacus said, nodding sincerely.

“And I hate your ugly ass fins”

*Cue Offenbach’s Can Can music* Basco and Vex leap up at each other, in an intense catfight, both just slapping away at each other’s arms, and trying to rip the other’s fins/fur off, and clawing and fighting all the while making angry bird and shark noises.  
The main aim of the fight: TRYING TO RIP THE OTHER ONE’S FUR AND FINS OFF!

Shimazu slumped back in that backless bar chair, groaning, realising it a little too late, that the chair was…well... Backless, and tumbling down onto the floor with a loud crash, almost blacking out there for a minute or so. 

When he came to, after god knows how many minutes, Basco and Ves, the grown ass adults as they were, were still catfighting!

“Someone  _ reeeeally  _ needs to make a Monstagram Reel of these two with Offenbach’s Can Can” He said, shaking his head, giving up on the kids, and going in to separate them the fourth time that day.

As for the next flashback? 

_ Vex grabbed at Basco's tassel thingies and just pulled as hard as he could so Basco slammed his head against the lunch table and Vex just sat snickering like a fiend of nature while Basco was wailing. _

_ And then Basco was blindly grabbing at vexacus through his tears to try to pull a frill (he failed) and yes, folks, that was the FOURTH TIME they had to be separated THAT DAY!! And then the poor teacher carried him off, screaming and shouting to the nurse for the bruise.  _

End of Flashback, and back into the present, in an exact same scene of Vex grabbing at Basco's tassel thingies and just pulling as hard as he can so Basco slams his head against the lunch table and Vex is cackling like a fiend of nature while Basco is trying not to wail, blindly grabbing at Vexacus through his teary eyes to try to pull a frill (he fails… yet again, my friends).

Oh and did I mention all the aliens in the bar were watching it all with rooted interest, and trying SO HARD not to cackly, smirk, snicker, giggle, or any synonyms of the said words, cuz well, this was 2000 Year Old Ancient Warlord, a Renowned Bounty Hunter/Assassin, and a former member of the Red Pirates, with a reputation as fearsome as the other two.

And yet here they were…

Catfighting…

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah for those wondering, there's DEFINITELY gonna be a part two!  
> This is also for [@shadowranger05](https://shadowranger05.tumblr.com/%22%22) who I've known since *I* was five, and whose... KiNdA like Basco and Vex (YES I'm Basco)
> 
> Thanks for Reading! And lemme know whatcha think in dem comments!!!


End file.
